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dry out the fibreglass
prepare your nan
can’t have two poets in the attic, it’s weird
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During a period of intense productivity
play darts
read Kant
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Night on the farm, blessed by
neon control
there half the year
avec plastic conscience and
sell-pork
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Those Stalinist future shotguns
travel in pairs
vicious and green
with a blurred understanding of breath control
Avoid
Continue reading![blake's 7 bot on Twitter: "Blake's 7 Series A, Episode 09 - Project Avalon BLAKE: [To the guard] Right, remember to do exactly as I told you. And remember there are two](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EbGETFiXgAEhsyR.jpg)
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EXT: SOMEWHERE IN WALES, NOVEMBER
Travis stands around on an icy planet, in arctic clothing, his face unprotected.
Off-screen, the vampire crew member from Episode 8 is escorted out of the building for refusing to change in the female changing room, and replaced by a new actress.
She puts on the black S&M suit and approaches Travis.
‘Sir, we have located their position.’
‘Any guards?’
‘One. But he often turns his back so we should be able to subdue him.’
‘Good. Go and do that.’
‘What about you, Sir?’
‘I’m going back to the set canteen. Call me when you’re ready.’
The vamp turns to leave, pauses then rotates back.
‘What is it?’
‘I don’t want to speak out of place, Sir, but…’
‘You think my plan is convoluted.’
‘A bit.’
‘You’re afraid that I’m becoming one note…always relying on traps instead of being more offensive.’
‘It’s not that, Sir. I just don’t understand why we can’t shoot Blake when he comes to the cave.’
‘It will be explained in later dialogue.’
‘Yes, I’ve read the script. But why don’t we make a Blake robot and send that back to the Liberator? Then we can either catch or kill the real one when he comes here.’
Travis rubs his eyepatch, glances at the director.
‘Rant…’ mouths the director.
Travis nods. ‘Blake…I despise him, I will kill him, I will talk about him in my sleep…I will have him pushed into new galaxies and kill him there too…call his house at weird hours, label him a peasant, threaten his perm…’ Continue reading
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Starring: Christopher Lee, Charles Gray, Satan
Director: Terrence Fisher
Setting: 1920’s England, when Crowley was still alive.
Plot: Christopher Lee and a big, dumb lump visit the nephew of a dead friend, who they vowed to protect, and discover he’s hanging out with a surprisingly diverse group of Devil worshippers. The leader of this group, Charles Gray, has hypnotic eyeballs and is planning on inducting the nephew, Simon, and a sexy Italian actress into the group. Can Christopher Lee and the lump save them in time?
Subplot: A rival group of Satanists try to call Christopher Lee and tell him he’s seriously misrepresenting their beliefs, but he’s never home.
Sub-subplot: A lonely goat makes its first human friend and accepts his invitation to a forest party.
Thoughts:
I’ve always got time for horror with satanism in it…The Masque of the Red Death, Blood on Satan’s Claw, Witchfinder General…though it’s rare to see any that doesn’t equate it with evil or malice. Sadly, this one does, even if it is generally very watchable and well-made.
I’m no expert on this topic, but I’m pretty sure Satanists don’t actually sacrifice anyone or wish to hypnotise people into attending goat-killing, outdoor orgies.
Not that it’s really an orgy in this film, more like a bunch of actors dancing with dramatic arm flourishes and fondling each other a bit…or fondling the women. In fact, the whole thing is a bit tame, especially if it’s calling itself horror.
Has there ever been a group of Satanists that have sacrificed someone or done terrible things? Probably. I think a few serial killers claimed to be acting under the command of Satan, or following his ways, but that’s not a reflection on the whole movement. Continue reading
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If you remember playing Dizzy on the NES then some of this story might be for you.
It’s got the Treehouse Village, the graveyard, Zak’s castle, Fukuoka, Hong Kong, all the classics.
You can click on the pic above or The Fantastic Adventures of Dizzy to read the free PDF
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EXT. but really INT. – a stormy, misty, polystyreney set magically manages to stay upright long enough for a hag and posh model to spout cryptic nonsense about the balance of power on their desolate planet.
The hag moves around a lot to keep warm, asking the posh model if it’s really time or if she should go back to her Roy Chubby Brown vid.
‘Everything is in place.’ The posh model points to the stars. ‘Those three ships with huge flashlights are laying a trap for he who cannot die.’
‘Then we’re bringing them down here?’
‘Soon.’
The hag rubs her hand up and down her wooden staff, staring at the posh model’s white gown.
‘What is it?’
‘You look cold.’
‘I am ethereal.’
‘They gave me a cloak and I’m ethereal too.’
‘You are the dark power, destruction.’
‘Wow…you’re really in character…is that the only way to get through this?’
The posh model coughs, bending down to the hag. ‘I’m wearing a thin gown in the middle of winter…cos Terry said it would look ethereal.’
‘Luv, you can see your nipples from Albania.’ Continue reading
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HERSELF, WITH THE MONITORS
MAY NOT YET REACH US FOR BILLIONS OF YEARS
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IONS OF WHICH
DAMNED INNOCENT
UNSETTLE TRON
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Q-BACKED
IF YOU GIVE A SHIT
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KAZON MINING GRIFT
DEUTERIUM-COATED THREE YEAR OLDS
RAMPANT
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SAY IT’S OUTSOURCED
SAY IT’S DRUNK
SAY IT’S CLOSER TO A THEME PARK THAN A HORROR SHOW
FOX WHO?
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HALF A STAR FOR THE LIZARD EP
ZERO STARS FOR HER
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KEEP GOING DOWN THIS PATH NED
KEEP GOING DOWN THIS PATH AND THE KIDS ARE GONNA DISCOVER KORSCH DIG UP ROBESON THINK ABOUT
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VOIGT AS BAO ZHENG
STREEP AS THE ANC
DID SANKARA HAVE A LISP?
CAN KOREAN PEOPLE LIE? Continue reading
The state of things today,
messy
especially in sci-fi.
You can click on the pic above or here to read the free PDF…it’s around 30 pages, not that long, but too long to put up here in one go.
If you’re really looking for a story about Argentine robots, it’s probably best to keep moving.
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INT: COCKPIT OF A SHIP THAT LOOKS STRANGELY SIMILAR TO THE ONE FROM ‘SPACEFALL’, NO SIGN OF MAIN CAST.
The pilot or navigator fills in what he thinks is an insurance form while waiting for the cockpit door to open and the camerawoman to walk in.
‘Pre-existing conditions? Assumption of risk? Foam allergies?’
He reads it again, confused. Then reads the title of the form and looks even more confused.
‘Was this handwritten?’ he asks the lighting guy.
The lighting guy shrugs.
Terry Nation emerges from behind a nearby console and grabs the form out of the pilot’s hand.
‘Hey, I’m not done yet…’
‘Wrong form.’
‘But you gave it to me…’
‘My mistake.’
The director shouts at Terry Nation to get out of the shot, so he ducks behind the console.
The scene keeps rolling, the door opens, the pilot turns to the camerawoman, supresses the urge to say ‘know how to turn that on luv?’ and instead says, ‘I’m glad you’re here, I could use the company.’ Continue reading
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Warning: this post contains lazy historical comparisons
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I haven’t read any of the Trek books so I could be way off on this, but looking at the map of the Alpha Quadrant, it seems that both the Klingon Empire and the Romulan Star Empire are spread a little thin.
I know the Romulans semi-collapsed after their star went nova and, according to memory alpha, became the Romulan Free State, so I’ll leave them out and focus on the Klingons.
Here’s what I know [from DS9 and memory alpha and even Enterprise…correct me in the comments if I’m wrong cos there’s a good chance I am]:
The Klingon Empire wasn’t always obsessed with swinging batl’ths [sic] at alien planets, they became more militaristic as they expanded out into space. Actually, I don’t know when exactly the balance shifted, I’m just going off of the conversation between Archer and his lawyer in ‘Judgment’ [same actor who played Martok], where Archer is told that Klingons used to appreciate science and art and medicine more, but the military flashed their platform boots and altered the direction of their culture. From that point on, all the kids wanted to die before they were 25 [preferably in battle, but brawling with their mates also worked] and play suicidal drinking games in between.
After the transition into a conquering force, they used a mixed strategy to expand and build their empire. Colonies were set up on empty M class planets/moons, alien planets were conquered by force and subjugated, other alien worlds were annexed [not sure if they needed to fight these worlds, just offering them economic advantages and giving them freedom to rule themselves could’ve been enough], and…I think that’s it, three types of conquering.
The most direct form was seen or referenced in the original Trek episodes, as well as the Season 4 war with Cardassia in DS9, where the Klingons would blitzkrieg the alien world, execute all government officials, install a Klingon governor to put down any further resistance and then start exporting Klingon TV serials from Q’onos. Continue reading
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To avoid scrolling down the main page, you can read part 1 and part 2 here…
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At 08:57 Picard walks into Interrogation Room 1 and stops, startled.
For the first time in his life as Captain, the crew are early to something, and not just something. His trial. Do they hate him?
He sits down and nods at Admiral Henry. No response back. It looks like he needs a dump. This is a good sign, thinks Picard. If I can make him get up and leave, the trial’s over.
Satie is glaring at him.
The betazoid is holding another pad.
Worf is sitting on the other side, in the advocate’s chair. Picard gets up and runs over, asking him quickly, ‘are you representing me?’
‘I think so, Captain.’
‘Remember the drumhead trial thing I said, Worf…’
‘Captain…’ says Admiral Satie. ‘It’s 9am.’
Picard sits down in the spotlight and shifts his body into what he read was the innocence pose. ‘Before we begin the lunacy, I’d like to give a speech.’
‘No,’ says Satie.
‘Under Federation law 24591-34 it is my right to speak before any trial or interrogation and, as far as I’m aware, we’re still operating under that law.’
‘Very well.’
Picard clears his throat. ‘Stop this Admiral. I implore you.’
‘Noted.’
‘There was more, but I’ve forgotten…’ Continue reading
