Star Trek TNG: The Drumhead [Redux] Part 1

The Drumhead (1991)

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Black.

No nearby stars.

No planets or moons or nebulae.

We zoom in closer, picking out a speck of dirty white dust drifting through the void, at the mercy of whichever unimaginably smug higher beings are lurking nearby.

Closer, closer, closer still…ah, it’s not dust, it’s a ship.

The Enterprise.

The blackness lightens a shade or two, and we’re inside the vessel.

A Klingon that isn’t Worf sits in the sharp spotlight of a room with no decoration. Opposite him, sitting behind the only desk are two people: a lanky, part-time sleaze with a black beard and a female betazoid in a lilac leotard.

Behind them, shadows creeps along the edges of the walls.

‘I don’t know anything about that,’ says the Klingon, keeping his ridges hyphen-straight.

‘Is that so?’ asks Riker. ‘Then maybe you can explain why you were in Engineering last night, asking questions, lurking…’

‘I wasn’t.’

‘There’s no point denying it, J’dann, you were seen.’

‘He’s lying.’

Riker glances at Troi then back at the Klingon. ‘We didn’t say it was a ‘he’.’

‘What?’

‘We did not say you were seen by a man,’ repeats Troi.

‘Aghh, most of the crew here are men…lobotomised, puny men who never speak, but men nonetheless.’

‘Okay. How about this?’ says Riker. ‘You were overheard in Ten Forward saying, and I quote, ‘you, Vulcan, wouldn’t it be glorious if someone broke some cables in Engineering and made this junk fly to Romulus…get captured by Romulans…put all you humans in the same cell, naked, and make you fist each other while the-…’ Continue reading

Bloomberg 1942-2845

Image result for mike bloomberg eating ice cream

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IF IT’S 95, KILL IT

IF IT’S 85, KILL IT

IF IT’S 75, KILL IT

IF IT’S 65, 65’S A GOOD AGE, KILL IT

IF IT’S KEN LOACH-ESQUE, KILL IT

KILL HATE EDIT FLAY

VOTE ME

 MIKE

 

THIS ISN’T THE KIND OF ENERGY WE NEED

YOU PEASANT CUNT

VOTE MIKE

 

YOU SAY IT’S BAD, I SAY PRAGMATIC, DEFINITELY WOULD’VE DONE THE SAME IN LA, DETROIT, SPIKE LEE’S HOUSE, THAT’S WHERE THE COPS WERE, THAT’S WHERE THEY WERE, ALL OF THEM, WHAT CAN YOU DO, THAT’S WHERE THEY HAPPENED TO BE, THAT’S WHERE THEY WERE

I WENT TO TANZANIA ONCE Continue reading

Lem Face [Poem]

Image result for stanislaw lem

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In their cores they plotted

better than Asaji

 

Premise 17:

Moon-invoking leads to executive producer

Factory made

Journey to the nice side of Tehran

Don’t meet Henry

 

Fonda identified children in Rome

Shook hands with mothergram

Forgot Manx

Didn’t waver.

 

Dogs in the dog café

Were not magnetic at all

 

Additional meaning can be found beneath the diplomat, well-oiled, certified, pirate mad

continue your illustrious career

 

drenched in school

pick-me-up

Continue reading

Blake’s 7 [Redux] // S01E06 – Seek, Locate, Destroy

Image result for blakes 7 seek locate destroy

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EXT: POWER PLANT SOMEWHERE IN SURREY

Blake wanders around dirt patches and random industrial edifices like a kid [me] waiting for his dad to stop fucking around with that fibreglass mould inside the hangar.

A robot on wheels appears and fails to spot Blake due to only using its face to do the checking.

Blake comes out of hiding and tells Vila to teleport down and open the gate.

 

INT: LIBERATOR TELEPORT ROOM

Vila contractually complains a bit, grabs his toolkit and stands on the pad.

‘Tell Blake to be careful,’ says Jenna.

‘What about me?’

‘And tell him Callie and I have come up with some targets for our next mission…’

‘Am I not important?’

‘And tell him we understand why he ignored us this time, and why he went down to the planet while we stayed here and why he insisted on meeting in the sauna last night and why he had to sit between Callie and I and why Avon was on his lap and…’

‘I was stretching, actually,’ corrects Avon. ‘Near his lap, not on.’

‘Can’t you tell him all this yourself, over the comm?’ asks Vila.

‘He won’t listen to me,’ answers Jenna with a frown.

Vila says ‘ah’ and looks at Avon, who nods and beams him down.

‘Do you think it worked?’

‘Your pursuit of more screen time? As long as they don’t introduce a sociopathic, power-hungry yet slinky female villain twenty minutes into this ep, sure. It worked tremendously.’

Jenna sighs. ‘I should’ve stayed on Earth and become a lobbyist.’ Continue reading

Whatever happened to Mirasta Yale?

Image result for star trek tng first contact mirasta yale

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I was watching the TNG episode ‘First Contact’ for the seventeenth time yesterday and after replaying the final scene a few times, I felt curious enough to check on the progress of Malkorian Scientist Mirasta Yale in the Trek verse.

First port of call was Memory alpha, which is basically the Trek bible [far as I know].

Her name was listed in the episode profile, but it wasn’t hyperlinked to anything, and there were no references at the bottom to other work she was in.

Strange.

After looking around a bit, I found another Trek site which seemed to have a database of all the Trek novels and shows. Again, it had references to her, but it also didn’t mention what happened to her after the episode.

Then I checked the forums, where people just speculated as to what she ended up doing. No one knew for sure though. I think one guy said that there was a reference to a Malkorian Scientist in one of the novels and assumed that was her as she was the only Malkorian off her planet. Another said that she married the blue alien from Ten Forward as she looked impressed when she walked in and saw him…

It’s possible, but she also seemed impressed by Data. And it’s not clear if she really believed in marriage, or close family relationships, as she left her planet without hesitation. Now I think about it, how did the Chancellor explain her sudden disappearance? A job for Krola perhaps?

Back to post-episode stuff: what did happen to her?

Or:

What reasonably could’ve happened to her? Continue reading

Blake’s 7 [Redux] // S01E04 – Time Squad

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INT: THE LIBERATOR BRIDGE, TIME UNKNOWN, MAYBE A FEW DAYS AFTER BRIAN BLESSED GOT BLOWN UP OVER CYGNUS ALPHA

Blake stands two feet away from Jenna, who is in front of the pilot’s console, running through the instructions to make the ship move.

‘Orbit rotation in sync,’ says Blake.

‘Check,’ says Jenna.

‘Rotate thrusters a bit.’

‘A bit?’

‘Not too much. A bit.’

‘More detail.’

Blake shrugs. ‘17 spatials?’

Jenna looks puzzled for a moment, checks the script then nudges Blake in the side. They whisper for a bit, Blake looks reluctant, then they finally swap positions.

‘Compensate for orbital drift,’ says Jenna.

‘Check,’ says Blake.

‘Align thrusters.’

‘Check.’

Jenna shakes her head and points at a different button. Blake smiles and presses it.

‘Engines present?’ continues Jenna

‘Check,’ says Gan.

‘Keyboard?’

‘Check,’ says Vila.

‘Bitter enmity?’

Avon growls.

Blake claps his hands together and looks at Avon, Gan and Villa, making sure they’re not gurning. ‘Okay, now we know how to move the ship, let’s check if there’s anyone following us. Zen, are there any Federation ships in the vicinity?’ Continue reading

The 3 Body Problem // Cixin Liu [Thoughts + Spoilers]

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Plot: The Cultural Revolution is laid out for 50 pages and characters that no one knows nor cares about die/suffer. The only one left standing is a woman who will eventually sell out humans to aliens living in the Alpha Centauri System [off-camera]. In modern times, a scientist/nanotech engineer[?] called Wang forgets his family so he can focus on a video game called The Three Body Problem. It’s not a hard game, not as hard as the original Mega Man, and he quickly comes across the alien plot to take over Earth. Luckily, it will take 400 years for the aliens to arrive. Unluckily, they’ve invented nine dimensional protons that fly to Earth and do their best Stasi impression, which in effect limits humans to doing nothing scientifically for the next 400 years, which in turn will allow the aliens to land on Earth and do what?

Subplot: Disregarding the blurb on the back of the cover, 100 odd pages are dedicated to flashbacks of the traitor scientist figuring out how to send a signal to aliens without telling us that’s what she’s doing even though we know that’s what she’s doing cos we’ve read the blurb on the back cover.

Subplot: Wang’s wife asks for a divorce.

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The above summary of the plot may come across as negative, but I enjoyed about half of this book, especially the parts focused on the video game and the three body aliens themselves.

However, it takes a long while to get there.

The biggest problem is definitely the opening 50 pages or so. If you’re gonna write a sci-fi book that starts with some historical context, at least write it well. Or organise it well. Or make it involving, either emotionally or concept-wise. What Liu has done is write a succession of scenes that involve characters we don’t get to know at all and then kill them off. Continue reading

Blake’s 7 [Redux] // S01E03 – Cygnus Alpha

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Trying to phase out the sleaze, but it keeps creeping back…

If you can’t be bothered checking the categories at the side, here’s where the other Blake’s 7 reduxes are:

The Way Back

Space Fall

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EXT: SURFACE OF PENAL COLONY, CYGNUS ALPHA

A man dressed like a monk raises a machete and chops a cooked animal in half. There’s a noise nearby and a woman also dressed like a monk appears, telling the man that the federation ship has arrived in the sky.

‘That shooting star up there?’

‘It’s a big ship.’

‘Well-lit, too.’

‘’tis true.’

The man frowns, wondering if any of the new prisoners are either a] bigger than him or b] sexier than him.

‘I guess I’ll leave dinner here and go tell Brian Blessed that the new prisoners have arrived.’

‘The new believers…’ corrects the woman.

‘Huh?’

‘They are believers, not prisoners.’

‘Right. What is it we believe again?’

‘Indulging Brian Blessed.’

The man rubs his nose bridge. ‘He did the Iago monologue last night.’

‘Soft then loud but never really soft?’

The man nods. ‘As if I  were at the back row of a stadium.’

‘You did the Lord’s work. Now go.’

‘Going.’

The woman swishes her hand leftwards and the man trots off in that direction. After staring up at the sky for a bit, the woman walks the opposite way, off the quarry set and straight into a barrage of ‘show us your crystal balls, luv.’

She shakes it off, reminding herself over and over that it’s not just here, it’s everywhere.

 

INT: PENAL SHIP COCKPIT, SAME ONE FROM SPACE FALL

The young lieutenant walks through a door with Flight Control Deck stencilled on it and tells the captain that the prisoners are all high as fuck and looking forward to Cygnus Alpha. Continue reading

Blake’s 7 [Redux] // S01E02 – Space Fall

Image result for blake's 7 space fall

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It’s been a while, but you can find the first episode redux [The Way Back] here

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INT: SPACESHIP/BBC STOREROOM, ONE CIRCULAR WINDOW TO SHOW BLACKNESS OF SPACE, LOTS OF CONVICTS SITTING ON CLASSROOM CHAIRS, NO TATTOOS

Blake sits with his back to the window, restrained by a piece of ribbed plastic tubing curving round his torso.

He surveys the convicts in front of him.

‘Who wants to join my crew?’

Half of them raise their hands.

‘Who knows how to act?’

Hands drop.

‘Okay. Jenna, Vila, Gan, young-looking student.’

Young looking student grins. ‘Hi, I’m…’

‘Should be enough.’

 

SWITCH TO: SHIP COCKPIT/DRIVE ROOM/BRIDGE/ROOM WITH 3 CHAIRS AND CARDBOARD CONTROL PANELS

An old-ish guy tells his crew of two to say some random numbers and set course for Cygnus Alpha. They repeat the numbers for a few seconds then the youngest crew member, we’ll give him the rank of lieutenant, goes back to the book he was studying. Continue reading