Malzberg Portal To…

Bajoran wormhole | Memory Alpha | Fandom

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HERSELF, WITH THE MONITORS

MAY NOT YET REACH US FOR BILLIONS OF YEARS

IONS OF WHICH

DAMNED INNOCENT

UNSETTLE TRON

Q-BACKED

IF YOU GIVE A SHIT

 –

KAZON MINING GRIFT

DEUTERIUM-COATED THREE YEAR OLDS

RAMPANT

SAY IT’S OUTSOURCED

SAY IT’S DRUNK

SAY IT’S CLOSER TO A THEME PARK THAN A HORROR SHOW

FOX WHO?

HALF A STAR FOR THE LIZARD EP

ZERO STARS FOR HER

KEEP GOING DOWN THIS PATH NED

KEEP GOING DOWN THIS PATH AND THE KIDS ARE GONNA DISCOVER KORSCH DIG UP ROBESON THINK ABOUT

VOIGT AS BAO ZHENG

STREEP AS THE ANC

DID SANKARA HAVE A LISP?

CAN KOREAN PEOPLE LIE? Continue reading

Robot Argentino

The state of things today,

messy

especially in sci-fi.

You can click on the pic above or here to read the free PDF…it’s around 30 pages, not that long, but too long to put up here in one go.

If you’re really looking for a story about Argentine robots, it’s probably best to keep moving.

 

Blake’s 7 [Redux] // S01E07 – Mission to Destiny

Mission to Destiny (episode) | Blakes 7 Wiki | Fandom

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INT: COCKPIT OF A SHIP THAT LOOKS STRANGELY SIMILAR TO THE ONE FROM ‘SPACEFALL’,  NO SIGN OF MAIN CAST.

The pilot or navigator fills in what he thinks is an insurance form while waiting for the cockpit door to open and the camerawoman to walk in.

‘Pre-existing conditions? Assumption of risk? Foam allergies?’

He reads it again, confused. Then reads the title of the form and looks even more confused.

‘Was this handwritten?’ he asks the lighting guy.

The lighting guy shrugs.

Terry Nation emerges from behind a nearby console and grabs the form out of the pilot’s hand.

‘Hey, I’m not done yet…’

‘Wrong form.’

‘But you gave it to me…’

‘My mistake.’

The director shouts at Terry Nation to get out of the shot, so he ducks behind the console.

The scene keeps rolling, the door opens, the pilot turns to the camerawoman, supresses the urge to say ‘know how to turn that on luv?’ and instead says, ‘I’m glad you’re here, I could use the company.’ Continue reading

The Fall of the Klingon Empire?

Sins of the Father (episode) | Memory Alpha | Fandom

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Warning: this post contains lazy historical comparisons

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I haven’t read any of the Trek books so I could be way off on this, but looking at the map of the Alpha Quadrant, it seems that both the Klingon Empire and the Romulan Star Empire are spread a little thin.

I know the Romulans semi-collapsed after their star went nova and, according to memory alpha, became the Romulan Free State, so I’ll leave them out and focus on the Klingons.

Here’s what I know [from DS9 and memory alpha and even Enterprise…correct me in the comments if I’m wrong cos there’s a good chance I am]:

The Klingon Empire wasn’t always obsessed with swinging batl’ths [sic] at alien planets, they became more militaristic as they expanded out into space. Actually, I don’t know when exactly the balance shifted, I’m just going off of the conversation between Archer and his lawyer in ‘Judgment’ [same actor who played Martok], where Archer is told that Klingons used to appreciate science and art and medicine more, but the military flashed their platform boots and altered the direction of their culture. From that point on, all the kids wanted to die before they were 25 [preferably in battle, but brawling with their mates also worked] and play suicidal drinking games in between.

After the transition into a conquering force, they used a mixed strategy to expand and build their empire. Colonies were set up on empty M class planets/moons, alien planets were conquered by force and subjugated, other alien worlds were annexed [not sure if they needed to fight these worlds, just offering them economic advantages and giving them freedom to rule themselves could’ve been enough], and…I think that’s it, three types of conquering.

The most direct form was seen or referenced in the original Trek episodes, as well as the Season 4 war with Cardassia in DS9, where the Klingons would blitzkrieg the alien world, execute all government officials, install a Klingon governor to put down any further resistance and then start exporting Klingon TV serials from Q’onos. Continue reading

Star Trek TNG: The Drumhead [Redux] Part 3

Review of Episode 94: The Drumhead | Saga of the Jasonite

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To avoid scrolling down the main page, you can read part 1 and part 2 here…

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At 08:57 Picard walks into Interrogation Room 1 and stops, startled.

For the first time in his life as Captain, the crew are early to something, and not just something. His trial. Do they hate him?

He sits down and nods at Admiral Henry. No response back. It looks like he needs a dump. This is a good sign, thinks Picard. If I can make him get up and leave, the trial’s over.

Satie is glaring at him.

The betazoid is holding another pad.

Worf is sitting on the other side, in the advocate’s chair. Picard gets up and runs over, asking him quickly, ‘are you representing me?’

‘I think so, Captain.’

‘Remember the drumhead trial thing I said, Worf…’

‘Captain…’ says Admiral Satie. ‘It’s 9am.’

Picard sits down in the spotlight and shifts his body into what he read was the innocence pose. ‘Before we begin the lunacy, I’d like to give a speech.’

‘No,’ says Satie.

‘Under Federation law 24591-34 it is my right to speak before any trial or interrogation and, as far as I’m aware, we’re still operating under that law.’

‘Very well.’

Picard clears his throat. ‘Stop this Admiral. I implore you.’

‘Noted.’

‘There was more, but I’ve forgotten…’ Continue reading

Galaxies // Barry N. Malzberg [Thoughts & Spoilers]

ANTI-OEDIPUS PRESS: Galaxies

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Author: Barry N. Malzberg

Setting: his living room

Plot: Malzberg can’t be bothered writing a novel so writes the notes for one

Subplot: Malzberg can’t stand whichever sci-fi writers he’s criticizing [Heinlein?], but sees them at conventions sometimes so doesn’t want to use their names

Sub-subplot: A ship falls into a black ‘galaxy’, where narrative descriptions are endless

Notes:

The cover is good, the plot description is good, the 4 and 5 star reviews on Goodreads make good points, but the 2 star reviews are closer to how I feel about this.

Basically, the novel is a series of short chapters that function as notes on a future novel as well as Malzberg’s feelings on the state of 70’s sci-fi. Straight away this brings up two problems. 70’s sci-fi is era specific and, although some of the points remain valid [e.g. writing filler to bump up the word count, hard sci-fi writers hiding their lack of writing ability behind hard science], the era itself is long gone.

The second problem: if you’re going to write notes for a novel, you have to a] make sure the concept of that novel is interesting and complex, and b] keep your novel length down. Even at 180 odd pages, Galaxies is exhausting.

In fact, I haven’t finished the book yet.

Don’t know if I will either.

I’m on page 68, I think, and Malzberg is currently writing out potential dialogue between Lena, the main character, and another character who isn’t on the ship, it’s a flashback, a potential flashback, and I don’t really know either of these characters, I don’t care about them, and if this is the case then you better at least make the dialogue interesting.

It isn’t. Continue reading

Star Trek TNG: The Drumhead [Redux] Part 2

The Drumhead (episode) | Memory Alpha | Fandom

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Part 1 is here

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Worf smacks the table in frustration, making the betazoid jump and the Observation Lounge shudder.

‘This is impossible…’

‘We shall look again.’

‘All of the crew have been with us for over a year, I know most of them, there’s no way they could be Romulan spies.’

‘What about this guy?’

The betazoid points at a picture of Alexander.

‘That’s my son.’

‘Official records say he’s currently living on Earth, in a city called Minsk.’

‘He’s on vacation.’

‘Okay. What about this woman?’

‘That’s Guinan.’

‘It says here she has poorly-defined magical abilities…’

‘She runs Ten Forward. Sometimes.’ Worf shakes his head. ‘Her schedule is strange.’

‘Has she ever been to Romulus?’

‘No. But she has been to Ted Danson.’

‘Noted.’

Worf folds his arms. ‘This is still pointless. All we have is vague supposition and guesswork.’ Continue reading

You can drop ‘dou ka’ no one cares

MISKATONIC LONDON UNVEILS FALL 2015 LINEUP! : The Miskatonic ...

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Koto wa + ka dou ka

Lurking in the abattoir

Once a week

Don’t smile, Nerys

Chief corrected himself 5 times to reach your view on leftism

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1 word novel

push gently

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Auntie-gone

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Greys can’t write about magic

from Metroid alone

cannot

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for hate’s sake

check out girly Héviz fun camp

winter thin coat factory

stroke complex

nice guard nice gun nice silt nice dust neat bit of Hungarian hiding well but

Vince Merry Man McMahon

I’ll finish this shit on Planet J

+

Forced by Polarity

To think about

Mercilessly cutting down the old Continue reading

Star Trek TNG: The Drumhead [Redux] Part 1

The Drumhead (1991)

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Black.

No nearby stars.

No planets or moons or nebulae.

We zoom in closer, picking out a speck of dirty white dust drifting through the void, at the mercy of whichever unimaginably smug higher beings are lurking nearby.

Closer, closer, closer still…ah, it’s not dust, it’s a ship.

The Enterprise.

The blackness lightens a shade or two, and we’re inside the vessel.

A Klingon that isn’t Worf sits in the sharp spotlight of a room with no decoration. Opposite him, sitting behind the only desk are two people: a lanky, part-time sleaze with a black beard and a female betazoid in a lilac leotard.

Behind them, shadows creeps along the edges of the walls.

‘I don’t know anything about that,’ says the Klingon, keeping his ridges hyphen-straight.

‘Is that so?’ asks Riker. ‘Then maybe you can explain why you were in Engineering last night, asking questions, lurking…’

‘I wasn’t.’

‘There’s no point denying it, J’dann, you were seen.’

‘He’s lying.’

Riker glances at Troi then back at the Klingon. ‘We didn’t say it was a ‘he’.’

‘What?’

‘We did not say you were seen by a man,’ repeats Troi.

‘Aghh, most of the crew here are men…lobotomised, puny men who never speak, but men nonetheless.’

‘Okay. How about this?’ says Riker. ‘You were overheard in Ten Forward saying, and I quote, ‘you, Vulcan, wouldn’t it be glorious if someone broke some cables in Engineering and made this junk fly to Romulus…get captured by Romulans…put all you humans in the same cell, naked, and make you fist each other while the-…’ Continue reading

Bloomberg 1942-2845

Image result for mike bloomberg eating ice cream

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IF IT’S 95, KILL IT

IF IT’S 85, KILL IT

IF IT’S 75, KILL IT

IF IT’S 65, 65’S A GOOD AGE, KILL IT

IF IT’S KEN LOACH-ESQUE, KILL IT

KILL HATE EDIT FLAY

VOTE ME

 MIKE

 

THIS ISN’T THE KIND OF ENERGY WE NEED

YOU PEASANT CUNT

VOTE MIKE

 

YOU SAY IT’S BAD, I SAY PRAGMATIC, DEFINITELY WOULD’VE DONE THE SAME IN LA, DETROIT, SPIKE LEE’S HOUSE, THAT’S WHERE THE COPS WERE, THAT’S WHERE THEY WERE, ALL OF THEM, WHAT CAN YOU DO, THAT’S WHERE THEY HAPPENED TO BE, THAT’S WHERE THEY WERE

I WENT TO TANZANIA ONCE Continue reading