Future Monogatari

Image result for naruto episode 216


Google translate ga yoku nata

It’s true, two years ago it couldn’t handle idioms, now it changes ‘raining cats and dogs’ to ‘heavy rain.’

It speaks too

in a train tannoy voice

but it’s better than nothing.

Okay, I typed too soon. Google translate is still weak. I just tried something more difficult, an idiomatic phrasal verb, and it did not go well.

‘The killer took him out’ became ‘the killer brought him [somewhere].’

A bit harsh as there’s not much context to that phrasal verb. The killer could’ve taken him out somewhere, it’s not impossible and, far as I know, google translate is the sum of its programmed database, not intuitive AI, so I gave it a bit more to work with:

‘The killer took him out with one bullet.’

Again, it translated as:

‘The killer, with one bullet, brought him [somewhere].’

It’s interesting, how would you programme common sense into an online translator that has no experience of our perceived reality? To google translate, it might be completely normal for killers to take people somewhere while carrying a bullet.

Maybe the only answer is AI?

That or the elimination of all idioms from every language?

The next problem: how to understand an episode of Naruto. I tried last week, Episode 216, but the first scene was insanely fast. Even when I slowed the speed down to half, it was difficult to pick anything up. Or you can pick it up, but you don’t know what it means. Do children really understand this?

My teacher said dramas would be better as they’re more realistic. Characters say things like, ‘I’m going out now’ or ‘what are you doing here?’ and it’s easier to catch. Theoretically. I haven’t tried any yet, but I’ve earmarked some sengoku era dramas for later.

Later could end up being never

Unless I find more Japanese people to talk to.

Once a week is not enough, nowhere near enough, not if I really wanna get to a level where I can describe the plot of the Masque of the Red Death without getting stuck on ‘he worships satan.’

Actually, I probably only need to learn ‘worship’ as Satan is no doubt ‘Satanu’ or ‘Satano’ or ‘Santana’.

I’ll look it up on google translate later

Before I go to Nagoya in April

And force my shit Japanese on ryokan staff.

Reading wise?

Teito Monogatari is still the dream, if I can find a copy.

Writing wise?

A story about Uesugi Kenshin mixed with the Yuki Onna mythology.

A Space epic with Slovenes in Space.

Grad Prospero, the story of a woman escaping to Romania with her copy of Teito Monogatari, trying to find the castle used in ‘The Masque of the Red Death’. Does she find it? It’d be a pretty boring story if she didn’t.

Left Wing Robots. Basically ‘Candide’ with political robots. Might do this one as a zine.

Hansel and Gretel 2

What else?

Read a book in the library, it said, ‘responsible countries should focus their scientific development on defensive weaponry e.g. shielding, and abandon offensive arms.  If successful, a new era of peace could pop up, nuclear weapons would be eliminated, countries could talk to each other without threats or bullying, exploited third world countries could be given the time and space to develop, everything could be great, at least until the US figures out a way to crack the shield and drag us all back down into the shit again.’


‘Large countries are an anachronism, the final boss to be exploded in the quest for a better, more charming world. No citizen is truly happy in these super states, no citizen ever truly gets what they want, no citizen has the chance to vote for someone decent.’


‘Media studies, politics and other countries histories should be mandatory on every school curriculum. Fuck Charter Schools, fuck grammar schools.’

As well as

‘The Stock Market is a rigged game for the rich, and needs to be slaughtered. The economy may look good on their little TV graph, but it’s not. If it is to continue, it should be used solely as a way of creating wealth for important pursuits like space travel, medicine, clean energy, Roger Corman films. As with most new ideas, it is not difficult to implement, it’s just blocked by a gang of dinosaurs who thought Burke in ‘Aliens’ was the hero.

Whatever happened to new ideas?

More than that

whatever happened to people being able to discuss new ideas without going nuts at each other?

Did it all die out in the 1800’s?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s